Sunday, 28 February 2010,
昨晚，电视再次播映《铁达尼号》。好像是第三、第四次看这部电影了。但每次静坐在那儿观赏，都有着不一样的心情，体验。小时候看，只不过是一个沉船的电影，再加上那句：“You jump, I jump"的对白。
昨晚再看，却悟出了一些看法。
1）人类的愚笨。人不能胜天，即使再完美，还是得防范不测。铁达尼号建成以后，人们却愚昧地相信它不会沉。救身艇也不够，最终死了千余人后才学到教训。
2）爱的力量。女主角最终能活命，是在男主角死前要他答应的。一个渴望自由的千金小姐，既然能在短短的四天内因为这个男生，达成心愿。可见，爱情之伟大。
3）爱情的荒谬。如此恋情，在现实生活中是不会有的。即使有，也是发生在少数人的身上。又是一部灌输虚拟的爱情观给现实生活中渴望爱情的人的电影，将爱情过于夸张的美化。
11:30
Friday, 26 February 2010,
不知你是否知道，你的门外站着一个人。他正在犹豫不决，很想敲门找你。明明喜欢，却又因种种原因，迟迟不敲，懦弱至极。好像很久再也没有人让他那么开心、自在地体现出自己。这对他而言或许是那消失很久的感觉重新被找回，所以让他那么兴奋。
身在异国，有你的地方，必有笑声、惨叫声。即使回国了，一碰面还是有机会和你玩。人生并不全属玩乐，而且在这种紧要关头，更加不可以。虽然他很期待、甚至渴望，但主宾不能乱。他决定先行回去，日后有了物质上的条件，再登门拜访。
还记得当你教他怎么玩游戏时，还未开始，你的手就已经有一大块瘀青，要他怎么打下去？“是男生就敢敢打下去。”，实为两难。那块瘀青，是段难忘的回忆，一时的焦虑。他甚至害怕你的父母会怪罪于他。
当他要离开时，门打开了。韩，就站在里头。
原来，那句要我负责任，仅仅是个美丽的误会... ...
22:23
Wednesday, 24 February 2010,
24 Feb today. If it was 2 years, I would have gotten so excited and will be preparing for a gift. Today, from a senior's point of view, from a friend's point of view, I texted to wish you.
No reply.
I thought maybe you were busy, but upon checking, it seems that there wasn't any earlier replies as well. I am worried, that you may be hiding from me. I think I have brought great disturbance to your life for a period of time. I must apologise for that. I am lost, seriously.
I thought maybe you have changed your handphone number and this is no longer in use. Maybe you have forgotten to tell me, maybe I have been forgotten. Nevertheless, it is also time for me to go too. Maybe, this signifies a new adventure for me as I put the final memory of RSS down...
Happy Birthday to you!
我把最美丽的你锁进箱子，扔下山崖，开始一个人流浪。
20:50
Saturday, 20 February 2010,
Dad left for East Timor this morning. If I am not wrong, he should be reaching by now. The desicion was made quite quickly. Maybe because of all these work these days, I have become more senile and slower to reaction, but nevertheless it was still a shock for me.
I wish he can stay in Singapore for work, but for his future, for a better life, he has to make this desicion. He'll return every 3 months, but still, it is something that the family has to get used to. This year has been a very troublesome year for me even though it is only 2 months. The road ahead will definitely be more bumpy. How I wish he can stay by me and support me through this year. Independence is in a few years, I just want to spend more time with you before I set out for a new journey into the society myself.
Someone was crying in the master bedroom yesterday night. It shocked me, and I almost cried when I heard it. We just seem to be reluctant for him to leave. I had the urge to tell him not to leave, but it will be very selfish. Mum came out after a while with rather swollen eyes, saying that she had stomachache. It seems that both of them had cried...
I was semi-conscious when dad was leaving for the airport in the morning. Just felt him stroking my head, then saw his silhouette to my brother's bed doing the same thing. I was too tired to bid him goodbye, but I think my brother called him later on to bid him goodbye.
I don't know whay life will be like without him, but for sure, I will do my best to prove that I can do it, since my grades has become a worry for him recently...
13:38
