Gone, with the wind...

Monday, 29 September 2008,

Phew, enjoy these photographs... This will mark the end of my secondary school life.

Because of Graduation, I haven't sleep properly for a few days. I am very tired, even as I post now... When I lie on the bed, I cannot fall asleep but instead, thoughts start coming into my mind, including the few events that happened recently... Even asleep, I cannot sleep well. It will be worse if I wake up in the middle of the night, it will take even a longer time to get back to my dreamland, which is in a disaster now as well... Cannot rest now, 'cos rest=slack=A1 gone... No worries, I will try take care of it...

I will cut my posts from now. O lvl more important. But if got time, IF, I'll come for a short post or something. Gd luck for your exams everyone. See you guys soon....

14:41

Especillay made for Nigel, as he complains that I have little photos of him on my blog. Look at what happened during the photo taking session...

It took ages for us to convince him to take a pic with vanessa. Now look at how 爽 he is...

He tried to act serious, but OMG, now he look 20 yrs older with that hair and look... LOL

His definition of a formal photograph.

After explanation, his new understanding of serious becomes like this... Diao

The photographer in action

This reminds me of somebody, but I forgot who. No worries, its someone who treated me very nice...

Erm, no comments on this...

We are not gays... He is attached and I am straight... So don't get the wrong idea...

Seldom see him look so serious before...

Stunned by the photographer???

No need to laugh at this... This is the way he look when he becomes "professional" in photo-taking... Lmao

Can someone call the ambulance, seriously, he urgently needs first aid.

Labels: Photographs

14:16

Memories with my tresures...

Finally, a family photo...

Your smiles will always be the source of my motivation...

我最疼的聪仔, with Boon Jian at the back... (No biasness here... Don't have wrong ideas...)

Nigel傅思豪... A thousand thanks for the things you've done. Friends forever... (But still, no angpow yet...)

Aidah, my partner, with Wei Hong, our sucessor...

"Father and mother" of the Sec 2 squad...

The angels of the squad...

We're marrying them off soon... This is our last photo together... LOL

We tried to run so that the couple can take a picture together... But well, too slow...

Even Zhenbagam is disappointed about it... LOL

The squad's laughing monster, and her not-so-good controller... My God, laughter does spread quickly like an epidermic...

A pic with the councillors... Top: With Rahayu. Bottom: With Rui Xia. Jia You, future leaders of the school...

Last debrief, giving them one last command... I salute you my squad!!!

Me and my boys...

My ideal chairperson candidates...

Since I call her ma'am, she'll be in with us of course...

Thanks for staying back guys. You've made my last day of school the most memorable. All the best for your EOY, CCA and future. Remember, any problems call Henry sir, I'll try my best to help. =) Don't forget to call me if you guys organise any outing. I wanna go too!!! Jia You Sec 2, and see you next year if there is a chance...

I lived up to my promise, I never cried that day...

Labels: Photographs

13:37

A walk down memory lane...

Our class flags for the Sec 3 camp. Top: Garfield, Bottom: Yippee

Mr Radha, eardrums almost bursting from the last greeting...

Mr Radha, a very supportive Form Teacher always there for me throughout the years.

Benson, my very best friend and encourager, together with Kok Chin, my best assistant. Thanks for the help throughout this 4 years...

Our flags will always stay high, like our dreams and spirits
A salute to Ms Tan for all the hard work she had done. A thousand thank you... I'll work hard on my Physics, and not disappoint you...

As 2008 comes to an end, my class chairpersonship ends together. Since 2005, it seems to be a dream come true, but now, I only wished that I could be better towards the class I served and done more things for the class...

One never knows how to appreciate things until they are letting go... Wishing all 4/4ers a very good luck for the upcoming Os and their future ahead. Once a 4/4er, always a 4/4er......

Labels: Photographs

13:09

Thursday, 25 September 2008,

Sigh, tomorrow Graduation Ceremony. Don't want it to come... First time dread Friday so much. Last time can't wait to see my squad. After stepping down, fridays are still as exciting... Tomorrow, I don't want it to come.

So many things to do, haven't do, want to do. Yet have to go. The squad and the unit holding me back now... I just want to stay and be with them... Sleepless nights these few days, I think tonight will be horrible... Save me. Someone stop time please???

21:19

Sunday, 21 September 2008,

How to drive ants out of your house?
1) Put signs like Keep Out, Danger, Under construction, etc. outside your house. This give the ants a false idea that the house is not safe and has nothing in it.
2) Just keep an ant-eater as a pet. Lol
3) Put this question outside their nest and make them think about it. They will not have the time to come to your house.
4) Introduce termites (white ants) to the nest. Due to racial prejudice, they will start killing one another.

A giraffe was telling a mice how good it is to have a long neck.
Giraffe: You know, when you have a long neck, you can savour delicious food longer as it travel down your neck.
Giraffe: With a long neck, you can savour the coolness of the water you drink during summer.
The mice snorted and asked: Have you vomitted before?

A rabbit went to a herbal shop one day and ask for carrots. The boss said that they don't sell it. The rabbit hopped off.
The next day, the same rabbit hopped to the herbal shop again and ask for carrots. The boss said that they don't have it, and the rabbit hopped away without another word.
The third day, it came back again and ask the boss for carrot. The boss got very frustrated and said "If you come and ask me the same question again, I'll pluck your teeth out using a pair of pliers." Frightened, the rabbit left.
On the fourth day, the rabbit came back again. However, this time he asked "Do you have a pair of pliers?" The boss said no. The rabbit asked again, "Do you sell carrots over here?" The boss was angered this time round. He took out the pair of pliers under his counter and plucked out all the rabbit's teeth, hoping that this will teach the rabbit a lesson. The rabbit went home crying.
However, on the fifth day, the rabbit came again. This time round, he asked the boss, "Do you sell carrot juice?"

A rabbit went fishing one day. He came back with nothing. The next day, he went again and came back with nothing once more. On the third day, when he reached the lake, a big fish was waiting for him and when the fish saw him, it yelled at the rabbit "If you dare to use carrots as bait to fish again, I'll bash you up for sure!!!"

A mice went to a bakery one day and asked very politely, "Do you have a hundred buns?" The baker shook his head and said no. Disappointed, the mice went home.
The nest day, the mice came and asked the same question, but in the end he got the same reply.
On the third day, when the baker saw the mice coming, he exclaimed excitedly, " We have a hundred buns today!!!" The mice was very happy and said, "Alright, I'll take two..."

*Gotten these from Si Ying's jokebook. Lame, but made me laughed throughout the last half an hour of Math last Friday...*

15:49

Saturday, 20 September 2008,

Another week gone. This left me with 5 schooling days in Riverside Sec. Half-heartedly want to leave. I am tired, really tired of the different responsibilities I shoulder over these years. It seems Graduation Day is the day all these responsibilites will finally be put down... Yet, there are many more things I have learnt, I have gained over these years. To this group of people, I don't know why but I just don't wanna let go... Sry for my selfishness, but, I think that's Henry, over-sentimental. Sigh...

Over these years of schooling, I have been dragged into the position of chairpersonship. First two years, I was overwhelmed by the excitement that indeed, I've offended many unintentionally. Only near the end of Sec 2, I realised that I've been more like a shouting idiot. Never had the chance to apologise...

Sec 3, I wanted to have a taste of being an ordinary student, but again, elected as chairperson. Tired by then, but still, I will have to shoulder it and serve my best and more. My indesiciveness and hot-tempered may have once again offended many, but I think it's a bit too late now to apologise... I've been exercising emotional control, but, I think I've got low EQ. Other than sorry, its just more sorry. After Friday, I will disappear and all this rubbish from me over the years will end.

However, changing view from classroom to CCA, I start to get very, very confused. It started out with me not very fond of it, but now, I am starting to miss all these trainings. The scoldings, pumpings, drilling will always be remembered deeply. Looking back now, the time when I was a cadet is much more memorable than after being NCO, although I only get more bonded to the squad from end of Sec 2 onwards... Less worries and responsibilities then, until this bunch of rascals appear in my CCA life. I tried to make their trainings less tough and make sure that they don't start out like me.

They were my new source of inspiration, motivation. No matter how much low I am, their smiles never fail to cheer me up. Some of them share similar habits as I do. That makes me even more attached to them. Talking to them makes me feel like talking to long lost friends. The confidence that I've lost over the years can also re-surface during their trainings. Let's just hope that I would be leave without shedding a tear for them. The only regret still is, I never had a photograph with all of them...

Sigh, when it comes to parting, Henry is always so emotional and hopelessly stubborn. If only he can let go more easily, life will be easier for him, wouldn't it?

4 years, strangers became friends, some friends become strangers once again. After all the work, we'll just be left with one goal-- O lvl... I wish, I wish, with all my heart, that all the people around me will get the dreams they want...

*The ballroom turns quiet once again after the ball ended...*

18:16

Thursday, 18 September 2008,

Lets101 Quizzes - Blog Quizzes

Only half of it true... Don't know about opposite gender yet, smart and adaptive? Maybe... But, really like to listen to friends' secrets and try my very best to keep them, 'cos I extremely KPO. LOL. Only one or two occasions I leaked out accidentally, and the effects were disasterous... I hate betrayers, 'cos I give people my trust totally very easily.

True, I have little control over my pleasures. I can become crazy at times... Carefree? I don't think so... Looks like when Chinese and West meets, weird combinations are formed...

Anyway that's all for today. Gotta go find cure for headache. Cya next time.=D

17:59

Wednesday, 17 September 2008,

Lets101 - Free Online Dating

OMG!!! Quite true about me. Though I am not sure about the kissing part... Some parts are also questionable...

17:59

Tuesday, 16 September 2008,

Nth much today... Found the solution to keep me awake on Tuesday after Monday's tiring swim. The "solution"= chicken essence. First time drinking it. Taste like the Marmite i put in my porridge, but it does help. At least didn't shut down just like that in school today.

Sec 2 went to dry shoot today. Rather excited, 'cos their first time. Wanted to sneak out humanities to go help them check their uniform. Going HQ for shoot, must have tip-top uniform... But then, time practise is more important, so I stayed and did my time practise. By the time bell rang, they were gone. But, good news were brought back, and I couldn't focus now, 'cos it too good to be true...

Went to CWP to buy the disc I wanted long time back, FAITH. $18.95. I have to use my own savings... Thought it was nice, turned out to be all Chirstian songs, about Jesus and Lord. Money wasted totally. Could have bought the book on the weakness of human and how to make life better. That book only $13+.

Saw Toh Nguan today. Since March, the glimpse of him during his CO concert, never saw him again. The last time we had a face-to-face chat was 2 years back... Lost of words when I saw him at CD-RAMA. Just said hi, then good bye and went off. So confused by then that I forgot to greet John... The feeling of meeting an old friend, weird. There is lots to say, but the mind cannot process them in words...

Still feel like hitting myself in the head for making such rash desicion. Should have been more clever to buy that book. But, I have too much to read for the holidays... Maybe I'll take it as a lesson learnt ba...

*HAPPY 85th BIRTHDAY TO MM Lee, may he have a blessed birthday today!*

20:13

Friday, 12 September 2008,

Was staying back after focussed study today. Was told to have a class comm. meeting but was cancelled last minute. So like always, stay back for a while to watch NP training.

Fridays with parades are quite fun for me. Usually I'll go to the changing room to help my junoirs with their uniform before going out. Don't wanna see them being punished.=P So CLs have fewer reasons to scold and punish.

Today, it was the Sec 2 that changed first. I happened to go wash my face and they were in. So helped around with the minor mistakes. Badges can say still rather atrocious, badly pinned up and seriously need polishing. I am noob at badge pinning and had not been doing it when I was a cadet, so naturally I won't help. Requested the Sec 2 to help each other while I do the buttons, causing them to end up a minute late. Very sry.

Can see that they quite responsible now. Nigel was saying that he will help do punishments for a few boys 'cos their badge alligned wrongly as he told wrong things. Happy, but still asked him to help the boys change back. I want nobody to get punished!!!

The Sec 1 came in next. Very funny to see them in their uniform. Name tag pinned wrong side, the ring behind button bend till I don't know how to help and 1 more fellow. Helped him tie boot lace a few months ago. Till now, he hasn't untie it and was blaming me for tying too tight. OMG!!! His legs must hurt wearing and taking out the boots.

Very happy today. See their smiling faces again and their acts of innocence, childishness. In time like now, they are really great boost for me. Hopefully i can continue to see them smile more often... But if any of you got pic of the Sec 2, Sec 1, please send to me. Thank you... I have no pics to post.

I have made up my mind to become a CI. Hopefully I will see them soon, very soon. So happy now because of these events. Gd nite...

20:46

Wednesday, 10 September 2008,

Went for the Friend of Singa Award ceremony today. I found out that I am one of the 219 students receiving this Most Courteous Student Award. Was excited at first. First time in my life, I am getting this award.

Excitement and joy is very soon overwhelmed by emptiness. To a few, I am not deem fit for this award. I have no one to truly share the joy with. In school now, there is really almost nothing now. I don't know where I went wrong. People seem to loathe me. I feel very cold in class. After school, I thought juniors maybe may cheer me up. They do, very much. However, when I learn about things they may be hiding from me, i get very worried. These few days are again bad nights for me. I don't know why. I feel that I have not done enough. Never in my life have I ever have such special bond to a group of people. When they're sad and demoralise, I get even more worried and demoralise.

To be frank, I am very tired of such life. I really have the urge to go back to teach them, train them. Some of them want it, I craved for it. If chairperson of another unit can still go back in full uniform every training, why can't I do it? Yes, the Os is important. But, I am not requesting to be there weekly, throughout the whole training. I will be contented just by talking to them and understand their woes, just for a while. 4 years of harsh training have drilled into my mind so deep that every week, I will have to be under the sun for the whole day for 1 day, and every week, I polish my boots. It is a form of de-stress sometimes, venting all frustration on the pair of boots. No more now...

12 more schooling days, 12 more cold, horrible schooling days. What can I do to make it memorable. I don't want to leave with so many sad memories. I don't want... ...

*Is this really anxiety disorder? Someone end it. I am losing it...*

20:23

Tuesday, 9 September 2008,

Today had another motivation talk by Mr Raja today. Motivation. He was asking what is it. Are we motivated? Answers naturally come to my mind as each of the definitions come out.

Motivation: An inner force from deep inside you heart driving you, pushing you forward. When you are down, it acts as a form of consolation, giving you strength to move forward and stay strong...

Are you motivated?: Yes was the first answer that come to my mind. I am motivated by that special group of people that always greet me with a smile almost everyday. They share my joys, I share their woes. When in need, I ask them to come for me. This is the inner strength that has been pushing me since Sec 3. I feel very contented just by looking at them smile with each other. Watching them grow makes me feel a very huge force driving me forward. Yes. I am motivated.

Nowaday on Fridays, the familar commands always stir up my emotions even though I am supposed to be "focus studying". I have the urge to go out to take a look. When lessons end, I'll just stand there and watch, just like some senoirs do in the past.

I have 6 more days to see them before they go for their streaming. By the time they finish, I think I myself will step into Riverside's history too. In this last 6 schooling days that we still can meet, hopefully I can take a real, good look at everyone before I leave and forget...

Thank you, my Sec2, my motivation...=D

17:43

Friday, 5 September 2008,

晓文坐在床前，听着收音机，看着衣橱上挂着的白色礼服，地上鞋盒上的白色皮鞋，再看着门上贴的“喜”字，不禁对自己笑了。明天，他就要当上新郎官了；今晚却因兴奋，紧张而睡不着觉。此时，收音机正播着《出嫁》。

红红的烛火在案头
我的心也照得发烫
红红的双喜映眼中
脸上却挂着泪两行... ...

过去与慧慧的事不禁浮现在他的脑海里。还记得，他们是在中三的时候认识的。当时是新学年的开始，晓文正拿着美术比赛所以需做的模型，走向美术室。慧慧那时边走边读书。两人不小心撞着了对方。因为那时下雨地滑，他俩都摔倒了。结果，晓文的模型坏了，慧慧的书也湿了。两人公然在走廊上吵了起来，直到老师出面，才肯罢休。回到教室后，他们竟然发现是同班！很不巧的，两人竟被老师安排为同桌。不管两人怎样激烈地反对，老师却无动于衷。就这样，他们以赌气，争吵的方式过了中学... ...

昨天的潇洒少年郎
今天要变成大人样
掩不住嘴角的轻笑
全都是期待和幻想... ...

中四会考毕业，晓文以优异的成绩进入了其中一间顶尖初院。原本以为被折腾了两年后，现在能清静了，可万万没想到，慧慧也进入了一样的学府，选的科目也与他一样。两人的争吵又再度开始。还记得，那年的越野赛跑比赛时，大家争先恐后地想冲出人群，想为自己的组别争取荣誉。在大家推挤的时候，慧慧突然跌倒了，按却没人注意到。等到晓文发现以后，慧慧以做到在地，抱着脚痛哭。

“慧慧，你没事吧？”晓文焦急地问道。

“你别假惺惺了。巴不得我脚断是吧？走开啦！”慧慧把话说完，试图站起来，却因脚疼，哎呀一声做坐倒在地。晓文摇了摇头，二话不说，马上背起慧慧，继续向前走，连慧慧的叫喊都不理。“傅晓文，马上放我下来。救命啊！”

“没人知道你在这儿，很危险的。忍着点，我背你去终点治疗。”晓文边走，边吃力地说。慧慧静了下来，默默地让晓文背着她走。过了很久，慧慧才害羞地开口，问道：“你为什么要帮我？”晓文的脸不由自主地红了起来，微笑了。不过他什么也没说，加快脚步往终点前进。慧慧不问了。两人再度安静地走着。当两人到了终点时，一是最后两位了。在场的学生，老师们都深感震惊，连忙从晓文身上拔慧慧扶去疗伤，然后扶晓文去休息。从那次起，他俩化敌为友，成为了要好的朋友... ...

很快的，他俩走在一起，成为了一对情侣。直到上个月，晓文成功地向慧慧求婚。明天，他就要成家了。这时，母亲敲了敲门，走进来，说道：“晓文，明天就是大日子了，怎么还不睡？早点休息。”晓文笑了笑，点点头就躺在床上。“明天不知道会怎么样...”

我用一生一世的心

换你一生一世的情

牵你的手

嗯... ...

Labels: Essays

11:23

Thursday, 4 September 2008,

Going with the wind to quest for the key to my success. May not be dropping by as often... ...

如果你希望成功，当以恒心为友，以经验为参谋，以当心为兄弟，以希望为哨兵。

--爱迪生

11:32

There was a man who felt that he is very unhappy about his life. He felt that he was on the verge of depression, so he went to consult a psychologist.

He told the doctor that he was afraid of going home after work. This is beacuse the moment he reaches home, he feel very panicky as he doesn't know what he truly wants. He doesn't know what is the right choice for him. In the night, he will become even more panicky and starts to feel afraid, causing him many sleepless nights. However when he returns to work the next day, all these fears will vanish. He was afraid that this may cause depression.

The psychologist suggested that he should go to the local theatre, where a famous comedian performs. His performance never fails to bring laughter to the audience. Maybe the man should watch a few shows of his before coming back again.

The man has his head lowered throughout the psychologist's suggestion. He remained silent for a period of time after the psychologist finished his words. After a very long time, the man lifted his head, reavealing him crying. He told the psychologist sadly that he is that famous comedian... ...

Many a times, when we get used to the role we play in the community around us, we may think that this is actually what we wanted, our true dreams. However, many of us will neglect what we truly feel deep in the heart. Our true needs are hidden by these roles that we play. When we leave our role one day, we will find that we are actually lost.

--Taken from《于丹〈论语〉心得》

11:05

Monday, 1 September 2008,

Phew, finally managed to complete the essay started on Friday. Hopefully you'll like it. I find that there is something missing in it. If you happen to know what it is, please tell me so I can perfect it...

September 1 today. Starting today, I'll have to work extremely hard to achieve my targets. These few months, I have been too tired to strive, too lazy to strive. Starting today, I'll try my very best to turn the table. Starting today, I only have 25 more days to Graduation Day. Substract the hols and weekends, I only have 14 days in school. Sigh, the climb through the mountain was shorter than I've expected. I still remember that in Sec 2, I was still very happily saying that there is 2 more years. Time flies, now I have 2 more weeks.

14 more days to see the junoirs that always make my days. No, not 14 exactly. They are having their EOY starting 19/9, meaning that they have early dismissal. This means that I only have about 8 more days to see them. Always have the feeling that tears are swelling up in my eyes when I think of this. All of them are my laughter, not just the Sec 2, but many other junoirs I know from other events. I am very worried about their results and where they will go, especially the Sec 2. They doesn't seem to be very troubled with the streaming. I am, 'cos this is the test of fate. Where they are heading depends quite a lot on this exams.

I always have this wish to take a squad photo with the Sec 2, 'cos during the last photo-taking session, there were only 14 of them in the picture. It seems that this may, in the end become another regret of mine when I leave school. When will I see my junoirs again? When will I get a group photo with them? I am worried, that I may just forget them as time goes. And by the time I am older, I will remember none of them...

Constant worrying. The Os, the streaming, the squad... ... When can I drop all these worries???

12:55