I was away these few days. 'Cos it's New Year, was doing visitings. Took some photos though. Will put it up when I am free.

Messaged by MOE at 6.44am this morning. Was posted to NYJC (Sci). When I saw it at around 10am after I woke up, rather stunned. I thought the results will only be out at 8am. Astonished by the time.

Was back to Riverside Sec for NPCC today. Was browsing the notice boards while having a break. Time flies. I saw some of my classmates' pictures on the notice board. It seems we have become history ourselves. It seems like yesterday I was a cadet. Yet it is just 8 more parades before the junoirs are taking over as CLs. I graduated, heading for a new institution next monday...

No feelings now. Just looked at the class blog. Putting the school and class together, seems rather depressing. From how I came here, using a longer-than-usual time to adapt to the new life, getting to shoulder titles and responsibilites to losing almost everything in the end... The ending is more painful than the beginning...

Although a bit reluctant to let go, things still have to move on. Hopefully this time I take a quicker time to let go of the past and embrace my awaiting new beginning of JC life...

想吐诉所有烦心事，
却没有倾听的人。
想写出所有心头忧，
却不是个好地方写。
唯有红色小簿子，
才知我真心... ...

Was working yesterday. The manager took me to Bras Besar Popular to purchase books. As they were processing the vouchers, I was browsing around. This branch is huge, with many books!!! Was walking past the Chinese Section, browsing the history books and classics.

Saw a book that I had been looking for for a long time. The book on Zhuge Liang, strategist of Shu of the Three Kingdom. I wanted to purchase it when I saw it a few years ago at Toa Payoh book store. At that time, I still do not have the habit of bringing money out when shopping with parents. So I asked my mum for money.

Unfortunately, she spent almost all of it on the offerings (fruits etc.) and does not have enough. It was the last book...I didn't get the chance to buy it the following week we went there (Visit my grandma every week at Toa Payoh). For so many years, I have been searching for it wherever I go...

Finally, I saw it again yesterday. Again, last book... Wanted to buy but manager was leaving... I called her, hoping that she will give me the time to buy. To my surprise, not only she allow me to have the time to buy, she even wanted to give me $15 cash vouchers to buy. So kind of her. But, I took of $10. The book $11+, no point taking so much.

So what I have been believing in does exist. "What is your's will return to you in the end"... Hope that this still applies to other areas of life. =)

There is work today. NPCC also pushed forward to today 'cos of the CNY celebrations this Friday. Couldn't apply leave, so decided to go CCA after work. Work ended at 5pm. Tired, but still today, I have this urge of returning regardless of time. So, went back.

They were having debrief. So I sat silently at one side, listening to the feedback and trying to picture what happened today. Surprised to know, the Sec 3 are knowing their committee members today. Stunned by it. The feeling was so complicated. Surprised, extreme happiness, a bit of disappointment yet so proud. Felt weak while I sat there listening to the officers explaining so many things to them.

Time flies. The baton has been passed to them. It is time they get ready for the baton pass and do their very best. Happy or sad, hope they will put emotions aside while executing duties. After all, they are from the same squad, growing up in NPCC as one family.

Had the opportunity to talk to a few today after the whole thing. I am sure they will do their best, and more. The rest, no chance. Hopefully they can read my mind and know what I am thinking. Afterall, we have been together for the third year running.

~~风来君相亿~~

Still working as the New Year approaches. When friends and relatives ask me where I work, it seems to be a rather difficult question for me to answer. 'Cos I haven't been in a school for long. Travelling to other branches to work rather often.



Started off at Swiss Cottage Sec. Worked a week or so, went to Fuhua Pri to help for 3 weeks. Returned to Swiss the week before their registration to help in prepararion. I was there all the way till school reopen. Then sent to Fuhua Pri again. However, the manager is very nice. She took me to the publisher to help do stock check quite freuquently since the end of december. It was an eye opener and my knowledge broaden quite a lot. How books come and go, why no books for sale etc... Then she brought me to most of her schools under her charge. It was like wow, more than 10 schools.



Sent to Chao Chu Kang Sec from the start of this week. Will be there for the week I think. Yesterday returned to Riverside with her. Coincidently, the new bookshop was also under her charge. So I finally returned, as a worker, not an instructor nor student. The feeling, a bit weird. Junoirs look at me in astonishment as I was at the carpark alone taking some books out. Quite funny.



School will be starting soon. My holiday adventure with the bookshops is draws to an end. Quite a really interesting job with many new things to be learn everyday. Will join the work again if I have the time next year. =)

Went back for parade today. Took the Sec 3 squad, used to be the one I'm training. Quite surprised to see how standards had fell. Maybe my standard for them had raise over this time. They are becoming CLs, or what I prefer to call, NCOs soon. Yet, I came back quite disheartened and sad...

1) We had usual uniform check. Since I left and returned last parade, I realised that more than half of the squad have not been keeping their uniform in condition. Unpolished badges, belts and boots made me irritated. NPCC, to me, starts from the uniform itself. Keeping them in good (I am not emphasising on tip-top)condition shows that the cadet is proud of the CCA.

2) Cadets have been absent throughout last year. They returned. I am very glad. But, because the squad's taking over soon, I wish to see them having equal standards and discipline. Constant reminders and nagging made me quite irritated, so I have to be fierce. Hopefully they know, I am not picking on them...

3) It has been a year almost a year since I stepped down. Because of the many factors, I have become rather close friends with the squad. Although I wish to stick around with them, I feel that I cannot take the squad. Firstly, my commands are a bit outdated. Secondly, it is hard to keep the discipline. Look at today, fidgeting in the squad after constant reminders. I am sorry I have to shout at you guys. It is very hard for me to shout at the squad. I feel extemely uncomfortable. I cannot bring myself to scold, punish the squad. Yet, I must do so, because I really want to see them succeed. =/

4) A campcraft re-test today shows where the squad's standard lies. Boys still have a bit of organisation problem and the tent built was on the verge of collapse. I feel bad personally. I had been a cadet with rather poor campcraft skills. Wee Kiat is a pro. He was IC for the squad's campcraft. But, due to many factors and our negligence before we step down, we seldom touch campcraft at all. Hopefully the squad will understand, we keep telling them their mistakes is not for demoralising, but for them to remember and learn...

Many tough things coming up. But a diamond needs to go through lots of processes before it can shine. I really wish that the Sec 3 will continue to work hard. You guys have unintentionally become a group of people I cannot live without...

I just send in my application. Till now the shock still lingers as I stare blankly at my verification slip. I'll have to stay with the institution I got into. I am really scared I made the wrong choice and live 2 yrs with regrets... A bit too late now. All the adults that are giving me advises are out to work... I haven't told my parents about my choice either....


1) Nanyang JC (sci)
2) Pioneer JC (sci)
3) St. Andrew JC (sci)
4) Seragoon JC (sci)
5) Innova JC (sci)
6) Yishun JC (sci)
7) Accountacy @ Ngee Ann
8)Law and Management @ Temasek
9) Psychology Studies @ Temasek
10) Financial Informatics @ Singapore
11) Accountancy @ Singapore
12) Banking and Financial services @ Singapore

And I took CLEP... I am worried about the subject combo and my GP if CLEP is really possible... God, help me....

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 Tag 4 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by (Kok Chin) and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. Which will you choose, friendship or relationship?
I don't know it myself. Still reflecting on the question.

2.Would you fall in love with a girl older than you?
Never!!!

3. Do you enjoy going to school?
Neutral. No comments. But seeing the junoirs sure is blissful.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
- Give 1 mil to grandparents.
- Give 1 mil to preants.
- Move to my favourite bungalow.
- Save 2 mil for myself.
- Give half mil to my bro.
- Give half mil to charity.
- I'll put the rest in fixed deposit. For interest, for retirement.

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
Don't think so. Cos most of them are males. Lol

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
Being loved? Loving someone without them knowing is very painful... =/

7. List out your favourite type of songs:
Classical, sad songs

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
I'll wait. Cos she is the Chosen One. I will follow my heart and wait....

9. Is there anything that has made you extremely happy?
Cannot remember. Short-term memory loss. Paisey

10. What makes you angry?
- Being mistaken
- Being accused
- Being insulted.
- The list goes on.....

11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
Someone with a family hopefully.

12. Who are currently the most important people to you?
- Family
- Sec 3 Squad ('09)
- The owner of the face...

13. What is the most important thing in life?
- Health
- Kinship
- Friendship
-Love
- A bit of wealth

14. Single or attached? With who?
Single. With only myself... ==

15. What is your favourite colour?
- White
- Blue
- Green

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
Usually yes. 'Cos once in love, I know she will be the one and only one for me. I'll make sure it last for eternity.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
Depend on my heart. Whoever the heart feels right, she is the one... The heart never lies.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
It takes time... But, yes.

19. What do you want to tell the someone you like?
I really like you a lot. I'll wait for you, no matter how long it is.

20. 4 people I have tagged:
- Qiqi
- Jarren
- Nigel
- Boon Jian

Today got back O level results. Quite nervous. When they announced the top students, I was clapping like hell. Nadiah!!! From 4/4!!! The excitement was to the extreme.

Then came the list with 8 distinctions... I know I cannot get that, so I waited.

Then came 7 distinctions... It will be a miracle if I got it. So i continue clapping, and waited

Then with the list of 5 distinctions. I was hoping I hit the list, so I got all worked up. However, as the list hits the end, my name was no where to be found. I started to get very nervous. Could all the nightmares be true? I dreamt myself getting E8s for EL. I dreamt myself having a rough time at the release of results. All these made me scared, and I had to wake abruptly for so many nights. It was this face, this beautiful face that calms me down and told me that it will be ok...

So I continue to wait for my turn to know the answers. At the same time, I was looking out to see if this face can be spotted amongst the crowd of students. I promised, to present a piece of good result slip to the owner of the face. Alas, the figure could not be spotted.

Just then, Mdm Lua came. She asked me if I got back my results. I got very frightened and ask how I performed. She told me I was eligible to go for JC, but the results may not be what I've expected. She told me to relax and don't stress myself up so easily. I smiled weakly and continue waiting.

Finally, the results came. Without looking I flipped it back and moved to a quiet corner, slowly revealing the results to myself. The Ts shocked me. Where are the Os? Finally it dawned on me that indeed I've done a bad job. A 13 point with 4 bonus. Although I end up with a single pointer, it still leaves me no where. If only lucky 8 would appear, my dreams will come true.

Stuck in the middle, with no where to go. A headache brew, as I start to re-choose. High hopes were dashed, but that's ok. I will work harder, and prove to myself one day...

Thousand sorry to you, the owner of the face. I meant to give you something with lots of rain. Yet 2 and 3 came, there nothing I could do. Thank you for you wishing, thank you for your congrats. Yet I am still guilty, because I broke you my promise.

This year's motivation statement: Stay happy and think positive, 'cos the day still goes on...

Poor thing, the economy this year is rather bad. How I know? Not from the news, but from my surroundings. Every year, my brother gets a cake (From Hagen Daz, etc) from my aunt for birthday, and gifts as well. This year however, there is no more cake. Gifts, 2 bottles of bird nest from Japan. Well, we'll have to look from different angles. My aunt has been buying us things all year long, and recently, my brother spent quite a lot at the Converse Warehouse Sales. Maybe, those are the gifts?

Well, if that doesn't count, then how about this. I went to get a new pair of specs earlier in the afternoon. My dad isn't paying it for me. He says I am working, and is able to purchase 1 myself. Quite true. However, I have always been able to purchase it myself even when I'm not working. Maybe I am more financially abled now, so he doesn't want to sponsor me. But, I have always have enough...

Haha. Whatever the reason is, hope that 2009 will be a better year for the adults, or we suffer...

22:03